Wendip Week 2018 (Again, with Kamen Rider Weird and Phoebe Pines)
by CastleofFiction
Summary: Once again breaking the fourth wall to celebrate Dipper and Wendy's love for each other are the dynamic duo of this universe. DISCLAIMER: May take longer than the week to actually finish writing all stories. Hang in there.
1. Prologue: Wow, Again Already?

Ken sighed as he slipped on the fourth wall-breaking watch that Ford had given him some time ago. "It's that time again, I suppose..."

"Oh, come on, Ken," the redheaded Phoebe Pines joined him, bringing Cherry Pitt Colas for both of them while brandishing her own matching watch. "You enjoyed last year, what makes this one so different?"

"Oh, don't get me wrong - thanks," Ken took the offered can as he spoke. "I still look forward to telling more stories about your parents and their everlasting bond. I just wish we had more of my series out so we could go into future stuff."

A voice from the heavens called "Hey, I'm going as fast as I can, OK? I have a life outside of this universe! Besides, sounds like Phoebe didn't tell you yet."

"Sorry, Boss" responded Ken, before registering the entire message. "Wait, what?"

"Right" Phoebe facepalmed. "So, we're putting a mild spoiler tag. We don't know if we're going to use it, but if a story has a minor spoiler, we'll let them know at the beginning of the chapter."

"Really?" Ken grinned immediately. "Sweet! Shall we review the prompts?"

Ken and Phoebe looked at the paper together.

School

Typical Pines Luck

Combat

Date Night

Flirting

Moving in with each other

Bedtime Story

Potluck?

Wildcard?

Phoebe groaned. "TWO extra stories this time? You know, by 2019 we'll be scraping the bottom of the barrel if this keeps up."

Ken chuckled. "Well, then, let's see how deep the rabbit hole is this time."


	2. School

" _So, one thing I noticed when going through last year's picks is that we really focused on one particular era…." Ken said, throwing some papers onto the floor._

" _What, their married years?" Phoebe shrugged. ""Seems broad to me."_

" _Come on!" Ken scoffed "This week is about the bond they share in general. And we ended that week by reminding everyone that it goes back about 26 years...when they first met."_

 _Phoebe sighed. "We'd better not be going through that again. But I have a better idea. See, the Christmas after, Mom visited Dad and Aunt Mabel. At the time they gave her a key as a sign she could drop by unannounced whenever she liked."_

 _Ken laughed. "Yeah, how thoughtful of them. Thanks to SuperGroverAway for documenting that story, by the way, go check him out. Didn't they give her an axe too, though?"_

 _Phoebe glared at him. "Not the point. The point is, Mom chose to use that key as a sign of_ carte blanche… _.as Piedmont Middle School soon found out…."_

#########################################################################################

"Oh, come on!"

Dipper opened his eighth-grade locker to find several hateful notes from other students. He didn't really need to read them. He already knew what they said from the last twenty times this year that similar notes got in there. The good news is that as he picked them up they actually fit one hand. It sure was a lot smaller than when the year began.

"Whop!" Mabel poked him in the forehead as she showed up at her locker right next to him.

Dipper jumped a bit - some things you never get used to - before acknowledging his sister. "Oh, hey, Mabel. Enjoyed art class?"

"Of course, silly!" Mabel gave her signature laugh as her arms hung loosely by her side. "How about you, bro-bro, I bet you really enjoyed that lab we did!"

"Yeah. Still can't wait for high school labs, though..." Dipper held up the papers in his hand. "Mabel, have you been through my locker lately? We had a rule about this!"

"Whaaat?" Mabel made an expression of mock surprise. "I would never do that! You know I respect your boundaries."

Dipper snorted. "Correction. You don't respect any boundaries."

"Well, I at least know to not try to hide stuff from -"

As Mabel opened her locker, she was cut off by more pieces of paper falling out of her own locker, clearly labeled "pipsqueak" on the front. Dipper looked up at her and raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, um, those are mine."

"Really? Not unless they're from like two years ago. Do you even _try_ to make those excuses sound believable?" Dipper picked them up and added them to his stack. "Huh….still a lot less than when the year began..."

######################################################################

"Well, congrats, dude! Sounds like you're making huge headway against the people who try keeping you down!" Wendy eagerly said to her friend.

Dipper leaned back in his bed, enjoying the cell phone his parent had given him - or more to the point, the voice of the girl on the other end. "Thanks, Wendy. I'm not forgetting that at all, I'm really not."

It was the same evening after Dipper had finished his homework. On any year before this, he'd have spent his remaining time clearing through all the homework that was to be assigned for spring break. Normally he would've this year, too, but he had a promise to keep. After he had gotten his new phone, he and Wendy had agreed to call each other every few days. Not that either of them needed any encouraging to do that - after the past few holiday seasons, everyday life without each other was too commonplace and boring.

"So why do you still sound anxious?"

"What?" Dipper bolted upright. "Me? I'm not -"

"I know you too well, Dipper, come on…."

Dipper sighed. Honestly, at this point he wasn't really wanting to hide anything from his best friend - it was more out of habit that he even pretended to try. "Well, the truth is, they all came from two people. Gary and Davis. Seems they decided to double their efforts to make up for no one else backing them up anymore. Faked their signatures and everything, like they had nothing better to do, which...makes a lot of sense, given who they are."

"It's incredible how much some people refuse to learn. But hey, dude, you got this! Just show them like you did the last few guys."

"It's not that simple, actually."

"Why not?"

"Well, the parents of those kids complained, so the district board set up a new rule. If you try and fight back, you're considered part of the problem and punished along with the instigator. They could honestly care less if you were going to bleed out had you not done anything."

Wendy paused before responding. "That might be the dumbest thing I ever heard."

"Yeah, they called it the Pines statute."

Wendy groaned. "Nevermind. _That_ was."

Dipper continued. "Well, at least spring break is literally a day away. For now I can just keep my head hidden and relax for awhile afterwards."

"So what, back to plan A? Dude, if you give them that, they win!"

"No, it's not backing out. I just need some time to think of something else," Dipper replied unconvincingly. He looked at his books at his desk and decided it was time to get back to work. "Speaking of relaxing, I'm trying to knock out my spring break homework so I can actually have a shot at it. Talk to you tomorrow?"

"Alright, man. Just promise me you'll keep your head up, even as you…you know, keep it down."

"No worries, Wendy. I will." With that, Dipper hung up, sighed, and rolled of his bed to do some math.

############################################################################

Wendy stared at the phone, listening to the dial tone for a few seconds before hanging up on her end. She was always glad to hear of Dipper growing into his own, figuring out how to stand up for himself. Still, sometimes it was hard to believe that the same person who stopped an apocalypse from destroying everything in the universe could get pushed around that much. She knew that those same brains were pretty much why he was bullied, but that was of little comfort. And now the board had somehow decided that it was perfectly fine for Dipper to lie down and take whatever those two meatheads wanted to give him.

She eventually sighed "That dork" before deciding that she too should get back to work. As she opened her notebooks, though, she gasped at what she saw. Immediately she picked up the phone and dialed another number.

"Hey, Tambry, how's it going?... Remember how you said you owe me for getting you and the others out of Weirdmageddon?... Well..."

#############################################################################

"OK." Dipper said to himself the next day, as he was packing his backpack at his locker. "Almost done...I just need to get out of here, and blissful spring break is - "

"HAHA! Sup, dweeb?"

Dipper closed his eyes and groaned at the familiar voices. "So close..."

Two boys taller than him - one blonde, the other black-haired - flanked him from either side, making it impossible for him to move. Dipper just had his back pressed up against the wall as his locker door swung left and right next to him. "Oh, hey Gary, hey Davis. What' are you still doing here?"

Blonde Gary laughed. "Well, we can't exactly leave school for a week without giving the nerdy shrimp one last reminder that we exist."

Davis chimed in, "Especially when that same shrimp tried pulling a fast one on our friends." His hands flexed threateningly.

Dipper's first instinct was to cower and apologize. But that sentiment lasted a millisecond before giving way to the words Wendy had told him last night - _promise me you'll keep your head up, even as you…you know, keep it down._ He was too far gone at this point, so it was time to go all in. "Some friends they are, for them to ditch your little hobby since then."

Gary's eyebrow twitched, but he acted tough as he retorted. "Oh, I guess their notes got lost in the mail, then."

Dipper snorted with fake bravado. "No, I have 'their' notes right here," he replied, pulling out the notes from yesterday. "But honestly, a kid could tell you just wrote them all. If you really enjoyed it that much, at least put some effort into it."

Gray pressed him into the locker wall. "You wanna keep talking, boy, I can - "

At this point, however, Davis looked at the open locker and noticed something. "Hey, Gary, look at this." With that he reached out and took the lumberjack hat inside. _The_ hat.

"Hey! Give it back!" Dipper became defensive as his vision narrowed, only registering that the two hooligans were now fingering the precious photo of Wendy that he also kept in there.

"What's this? Dipstick's got a bit of an imaginary girlfriend, I see!" one began.

"And likes dressing up as her, apparently…." the other turned the hat around, laughing his head off.

"That's my friend from the summer! Oregon, remember? Making fun of my 'hick' uncle because he lives 'nowhere'? Now drop the hat!" Dipper remained locked in a fierce gaze right into Gary's eyes, but he felt a part of his confidence flag. He had fought well, but now he was losing and he knew it.

Davis laughed. "Right. Like someone THIS cool could come from THAT kind of place and be YOUR friend? I bet in real life your friend was ugly and dumb and..."

"Keep talking, buddy."

All three boys were caught off guard as they once again became aware of their surroundings. The taller boys turned around as Dipper's peripheral vision cleared up. All three of them had to slowly crane their necks a tad up, traveling from the boots...to the blue jeans..to the green flannel...to the red hair….to the blue-and-white pine tree trucker hat on top. For in front of them stood Wendy Corduroy, with eyes that showed anger at what she heard, but a smirk that showed she was going to enjoy what happens next.

Gary sneered, desperately putting up a brave front. "So, having your friend come down to save you? Having others fight your battles? You really are weak, runt."

"Really?" Wendy's eyes at this point were screaming bloody murder. "From what I hear, you two are the last of...what, a dozen people picking on my favorite guy? He took care of them without my help, and I bet he's smarter than all of them combined. I'm just giving him a bit of a break from dealing with you. Now then...what were you saying about me and my town?" Her voice made it clear that one wrong word would get them severely punished.

Davis spoke up. "Hey, you do know that if you attack us now, the school board will get you."

Wendy laughed. "Really, how stupid are you? You still don't get it. I'm. not. From. here. They can't do anything to me because I'm not one of their students. I play by Oregon state rules, where things get a bit more...physical." She flexed her fingers, long yet strong from days of holding her hatchet. "Wanna see?"

Davis and Gary both took one look at each other and bolted for the exit. Wendy called after them. "Yeah, you better run! Try messing with either Pines again, sucka!" With that, she turned her attention to the one boy left. "Hey, man. You ok?"

Dipper slowly stepped forward, unsure at first if it was real. Doubt quickly gave way to happiness as he hugged her as high as he could. "Wendy! You're really here! But...how did - ?"

Wendy hugged him back. "Good to see you too, buddy," she laughed. "It's actually pretty funny what happened last night after I hung up..."

###############################################################################

As she opened her notebooks, though, she gasped at what she saw; the planner in front of her said "school closed earlier for Spring Break. Starts Friday." She saw her chance to do the one thing she wanted to do more than anything at the moment; set things right for Dipper in Piedmont.

Immediately she picked up the phone and dialed another number. From the other side of the phone she heard her tech-savvy friend's voice say. "Hi, this is Tambry? Wendy, this really you?"

"Hey, Tambry, how's it going?"

"Wow, you never call this late. Something must really be weighing you down."

"Yeah… Remember how you said you owe me for getting you and the others out of Weirdmageddon?"

"Calling it in already? What is it?"

"Well, I know Mabel follows you on Twitter. Do NOT post anything tomorrow about Spring Break starting early."

"Oh, come on! I pretty much have to stay off it completely to do that! What justifies this?"

Wendy fingered the truck keys as she said, "Simply put, I need the element of surprise..."

#######################################################################

"Oh my God, you're the coolest person I know!" Dipper separated from the hug to look at his heroine with awe.

She cracks a grin. "What else is new? Anyway, you're the one who gave me a key for Christmas, you should've seen this somewhat coming!" She looked around. "Wait, where's Mabel? Doesn't she usually back you up?"

"Oh, well, we have different classes at the end of the day, so it takes her longer to get back."

Wendy grinned ad snickered. "Oh man, Dipper, I got an idea. I'm gonna hide in this classroom, she will go NUTS when she sees me!"

As she quickly took her position, Dipper grinned. "Break begins early, then..."

###############################################################

" _So yeah, quite the gesture eh, Ken?" Phoebe asked. After a second of silence, she turned to check on him and was surprised. "Uh, Ken?"_

 _Ken leaned against the back of his chair, scribbling numbers onto a notepad. "Oh, sorry, just calculating the fuel costs for such a trip."_

 _Phoebe looked at him with befuddled amazement. "THAT was the takeaway for you? You can't ask for broader scope and then tune out when we get it."_

" _Oh, don't get me wrong, I loved every moment of it," Ken reassured his co host. "I'm mostly surprised your mom didn't unsheath her hatchet in front of those kids for messing with a Pines."_

" _Alright, that's fair," Phoebe conceded. "Personally, I think it's mostly because she stayed with them when in town. Can you imagine if Granny Linda had heard about THAT when the three teens came home that afternoon?"_

" _Oh yeah, you're right..." Ken chuckled as he popped another bag of chips. "Absolute bedlam..."_


	3. Typical Pines Luck

" _Let's play a game, Phoebe." Ken sat up in his chair straight. "I'm going to give you a prompt, and you say a phrase at a time to answer the prompt."_

" _I'm motivated more by curiosity than anything else." Phoebe said, slowly sitting up herself. "Shoot."_

 _Ken snorted mischievously. "You know you're a Pines when..."_

 _Phoebe leaned back. "You deal with the paranormal?"_

 _Ken shook his head. "Could be Scooby-Doo."_

" _You visit Oregon every year?"_

" _Your grandparents don't…."_

 _Phoebe thought for a second. "Things just go wrong for no reason?"_

 _Ken leaned back. "There we go. Now from what I hear, Wendy learned this lesson in a pretty wacky way."_

 _Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Try to be more specific, she probably learned this about twelve times in her life."_

" _Well, ok, then...she one day learned just how deep it runs in the family lore..."_

###########################################################################################

Wendy sighed as she cut the last of the branches off the dying tree, save the one she was on. Being an arborist for the Parks department definitely had its perks - being in nature, climbing fifty feet into the air, using the skills she was born with. But every so often she had to admit that dealing with a fir that had to be cut down was grueling work. For safety reasons, some of the branches of this one were deemed as necessary to cut off before the tree itself could be dealt with - it had taken up her entire day. But at least it was done now...time for her to call it in and go home.

With that she picked up her walkie-talkie and spoke into it. "Ground team, I'm done here. Get the buzzsaws ready."

"Roger that, Corduroy, we'll have it set up."

With that, Wendy did what she had done a few thousand times in her life - she undid her belt, looped it around the trunk, and began walking down.

Her leisurely descent was interrupted by an unwelcome sound - the buzzing of a saw cutting through wood right below her. A sinking feeling emerged in her chest as she pulled her walkie-talkie up and asked. "Smith, what are you doing? I'm still up here!"

"Oh nuts, they must have misunderstood me when I said be ready - they already began chopping. Hang on - fellas, stop! She's still up there! What do you mean you - oh no."

"Smith..." Wendy radioed in. "What's happening?"

"Wendy, it's stuck! They got it stuck, in the trunk, and they can't turn it off! The saw is just freely cutting into the tree. There's no way around it - she's going down!"

As if on cue, Wendy felt the weight of the trunk shift to the right, fully aware that in three seconds she would be in freefall. As she saw another tree nearby, she moaned, "Oh man, I'm gonna regret this." She loosened the belt buckle ever so slightly, took out her hatchet and aimed at the other tree.

"Just about...NOW!" She pushed off the trunk with her legs, the loosened belt being completely undone as she hurtled towards the other tree hatchet-first. The hatchet dragged down a full five feet of the bark before finally being embedded in and halting her descent.

The radio buzzed "Don't worry, chief, we'll get you down." Still, she couldn't help but have a single thought; _this has never happened before…_

######################################################################################

She fingered the phone in her hands, scrolling through her contacts to find someone to talk to about the day. Her fingers hovered above Dipper's name, but realized her boyfriend would be too panicky. His mom too. Mabel and her own friends would have the opposite problem because she came out OK. Eventually she landed on the one person she knew longer than some of the rest - and, although she loathed to admit it, had been a mentor once or twice before.

She heard the crockety old man's voice respond on the other end. "Wendy? What in the blazes are you calling me for?"

Wendy sighed. "Well, Stan, I need someone to give their honest opinion. Something strange happened today." She explained her physical trials from that day. "It should not have been possible."

After a pause, she heard Stan laughing on the other end. Wendy frowned. "Mr. Pines, how can you think this is funny?"

"No, it's not that….it's just...it's finally affecting you..."

"What is?"

"You and the squirt are engaged now, right?"

Wendy looked at the engagement ring on her finger. "Yeah, it's been a few weeks. What's your point?"

"I love the little guy, I really do, but he has the worst luck on Earth! The monsters, the dates…heck, I remember when he pelted you in the eye with a baseball! You finally are part of the family if you're getting the Pines luck!"

Wendy felt a chill down her spine. "Oh, boy...listen, can you not tell Dipper about this?"

Stan just replied, "What's that? The connection is loose - " and hung up.

"Stan, I - dang it!" Wendy stowed her phone in frustration, fully aware of how her fiancee would take this.

###################################################################

" _Your gregrunle is a jerk," Ken chuckled._

" _Yeah, well, tell me something I don't know," Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Still, doesn't change the fact that when Mom visited Dad a week later to have a date night and plan the wedding a bit.."_

##############################################################################

"Hey, I'm here...Dipper?"

Dipper looked up from his work on the table and hastily started closing books. "Oh, hey Wendy, I...woah, I lost track of time, heh heh..." He began gathering things in his arm to hastily put them away.

"You alright, man? This seems like your, well, itchy mode." Wendy lightly teased.

Dipper honestly answered "Well... somewhat, but..."

Unfortunately for him, at that particular moment two Journals fells out of the pile of books and opened to clearly marked pages. Wendy had already seen the first one before - Journal One's entry on unicorn hair. Which made it all the more suspect that Journal Four opened to a page on countercurses.

Dipper chuckled weakly. "Busted, huh?"

"You bet, man." Wendy sat down next to him. "This about the accident last week? I'm fine, I swear."

Dipper groaned. "I know you are, but...it feels like you're inheriting the family's bad luck. My proclivity to get into danger, Mabel's dating history prior to meeting Mel, Ford's thirty years of dimension-hopping...there's some common link behind it, some string of bad luck. I was looking for a way to break it after hearing that it passed on to you. I mean, I just….why?" He buried his face into his hands.

Wendy gave Dipper a supportive pat on the back. "Come on, Dipper, you're smarter than that. You mean to tell me just _now_ you learned I'm infected?"

Dipper looked up. "What?"

Wendy held up the still-open Journal Number One. "Having to fight unicorns." She dropped it, saw Journal Number Three on the table, and flipped it to the page about the bunker security system. "Nearly being squashed by moving pillars in an underground room." She concluded by opening to a page Dipper had added about the now defunct Society of the Blind Eye. "early forgetting who I am." Dropping all of these, she then looked Dipper straight in the eye. "All within a few months of meeting you, before I was even sixteen. The truth is, I started getting into bad situations immediately after meeting you and Mabel."

Dipper looked at her. "And you're saying you're OK with that?"

Wendy smiled. "I _chose_ to be in each of those situations. And every day, every month, every year I spent with you, I knew that I was inviting the same choice, and I would give the same answer. Because you know what? That's only half of Pines luck."

"Really?" Dipper perked up a bit. "What's the other?"

"Knowing that you'll get out of it okay. Because you're a Pines." Wendy flashed him the engagement ring she had accepted some time ago before continuing. "And when I become one, I'll have that same faith because my guy will always have my back when I need it most. So stop worrying about it until it happens, ok?" She waited for his answer, wondering if the poor guy would be able to turn off the anxiety that always seemed to exist in his mind.

Dipper's brain, however, was filled with more than that. It looked at the woman who was his fiancee and remembered the night he had given her the ring. All the craziness of wolves attacking and yet she stood by him, without even a trace of doubt when she accepted his proposal afterwards. How many times did he survive simply because she was there? It was with this mindset that he pulled her in for a hug. "You really are the best, you know that?"

Wendy laughed as she returned the hug and pecked him on the cheek. "Yeah, yeah, your lumberjack queen and all." As they broke it up, she replied, "How about we cut the sappy stuff for now and watch another B-rated horror film?"

Dipper grinned. "That's not even a question, is it?"

########################################################################################

" _So, riddle me this" Ken got up to stretch a bit. "Did Stan tell him specifically to get them to have this conversation?"_

 _Phoebe shrugged. "It's not his style, but honestly? The whole family loved playing matchmaker with those two."_

" _Even after they found him a find, caught her a catch?" Ken grinned._

 _Phoebe shook her head in disappointment. "Worst excuse and method to spring a Fiddler on the Roof reference. Ever. Of all time."_


	4. Combat

" _So, Ken, since you're a fighter, let me ask you what you think about my Dad's capabilities in a fight?" Phoebe mischievously grinned._

 _Ken, however, was ready for the comment. "With or without this?" he shot back as he moved his jacket to flash the Journal Driver on his waist._

 _Phoebe shrugged "Touche, but I'm not revoking the question. Well?"_

 _Ken started counting fingers as he listed. "Skinny body and arms makes for small hitbox, that magnet gun gives him good range on electrical enemies and anything that can be knocked back, but not much muscle power and therefore not really good for melee purposes. He's more like Ford in that his fighting style just doesn't work without tech."_

" _You're forgetting one thing…." Phoebe leaned forward in gleeful anticipation._

 _Ken sighed and revealed several bruises on his forearm before continuing. "Be advised; do not hit him while his wife is around, even during a practice match. Learned that the hard way."_

 _Phoebe leaned back as the two entered memory lane again. "Spoiler Tag, but...You sure did..."_

########################################################################

Ken and Dipper stood facing each other a good twenty feet from the Mystery Shack, the younger of the two with raised fists in a battle position while the elder fingered a metal device next to his hip.

"You sure about this, boss?" Ken said anxiously, his face betraying his concern for his teacher. "I've known how to fight even before the Journal Driver existed. You're not playing with an advantage here."

Dipper was uncharacteristically calm. "You engaged Practice Mode like I taught you, right?"

"Yeah, nothing lethal."

"Good, then we'll be fine. Besides..." Dipper said, rocking back and forth like he was once again in a live version of _Fight Fighters._ "I was supposed to wear that. I kinda want to know how I would have done."

"Alright then," Ken whipped out the Chapter labeled 00. "I'm not holding back!" With that he clicked the button on it, unsheathing the metal contact tip as the indicator light on the drive turned green with a satisfying PING. As he inserted it into his Driver, the Driver began the chant:

"NEW CHAPTER!"

Ken's hands went high above his head before he rolled them into fists and slowly brought them down in front of his face. As the Driver continued - "WHO IS. THE STUDY TODAY?" in an upbeat rhythm - he crossed his hands and opened them to the fingers were on either side of the faceplate.

"Henshin!"

The second he spun the plate and it _click_ ed, a giant brown page grew out of nothingness and hid him from view.

"GO WEIRD! I'm a Kamen Rider for the uncommon writer!" The belt exclaimed.

Rider armor was sketched onto it before it drifted backwards, the middle becoming stretched as it reached Ken and tried to keep going. Finally, the brown and yellow Rider burst through the page as it shattered, the black buglike eyes on his mask giving the appearance of a man ready for a fight.

He raised his hand to the left as his Driver called out, "Quill Saber!" Instead of the normal silver blade, however, an orange plastic facsimile appeared in his hands. With it in hand he charged Dipper, who did not hesitate to shoot off three blasts of the magnet gun's pulse setting in the meantime.

TSEW! KA-SHING!

Despite being only a mock version of the Quill Saber, it proved durable enough for Ken to deflect all of the incoming blasts. Within seconds he had cleared the distance between the two and was rearing his arm to strike - with the flat, of course.

But Dipper had been in enough fights to know what to do. He leaned down and rammed his fist straight into Weird's gut, forcing the Rider back a foot. The bought him the precious second needed to roll out of the way and shoot one more time. Weird was not prepared for that, and with a THUNK the Quill Saber fell and stabbed the ground.

Weird jumped into the air and kicked down to where Dipper was, but the explorer deftly crossed his arms and absorbed most of the impact. It still caused him to fall with Weird on top of him, but Dipper had seen this exact position some time ago and simply had to copy a certain redhead. "Get off me!" he demanded as he kicked Weird off.

Inside the suit, Ken rolled a few feet and winced. "God, I hate practice mode! No enhanced strength...this armor actually has weight to it now!"

As Dipper got up, Ken knew he had only one chance. Without hesitation, he kept rolling until he got to where his makeshift blade had fallen. Springing up, he had just enough time to see Dipper raise the magnet gun once more. With a mighty heave, Ken used the flat to knock it clean out his hands before delivering a sidekick. Dipper and the gun fell at the same time, but one was too far away from the other to make any difference.

Before the archaeologist could move anymore, Ken's blade was at his throat. As the Kamen Rider asked "How's that for you, boss?" Dipper couldn't help but grin.

"Well played, Ken. I guess you really do make a better Rider than I would have."

"Then I guess the game is mi-"

TWANG! CLANK!

Suddenly Ken felt the blade being ripped out of his hand. As it fell to the ground, the two males noticed something else now sticking out of the grass - an arrow.

"Someone roughing up my dork down there?"

Ken gulped as he looked up in the treetops. Sure enough, there Wendy sat, crossbow in one hand and hatchet in the other, with a face filled with only fury. Looking down at Dipper, noticing for the first time how bruised he had gotten in the fight - complete with two scratches and a swollen eye, somehow - he panicked

"Wendy, it's not what it looks like - "

"Save your apologies!" With that, the lumberjill jumped off the tree and swung the axe at poor Kamen Rider Weird.

He was no fool and immediately began stepping backwards, dodging and ducking as Wendy continued to walk forward and swing at him. For all he knew he had just awoken a sleeping giant. But for all that rage, he never guessed that she had still kept her wits about her. For when Ken prepared to fend off another blow, Wendy rapidly switched to her crossbow and fired a bolt straight into the shoulder of his armor. Weird moved to pull it out before feeling his body stiffen. As he felt the tree trunk behind him, he realized what the lumberjill had been doing - she tricked him into backing up straight into a hard surface so she could trap him and show no mercy.

"I'm ripping that armor off you, Ken!" With that, Wendy began hacking at the chestplate, sparks flying as she made no progress but did leave the poor boy in quite a lot of pain with each blow.

From where he lay, Dipper looked up. "Glad I told you to put the belt on for this, huh?"

Ken could only reply between buffets, "OW! Yes! OW! UNCLE! UNCLEE!"

###################################################################################

After a few minutes of cleaning and a half hour in the healing chamber in the lab, the two main combatants of the day felt almost like new. Dipper had gone before Ken, and as the boy stood up after his turn, the elder of them turned to look at his unabashed wife. Grinning like an idiot, he said "Well, you sure were a big help today, but I think you had a little too much fun out there."

"Sorry, Indiana Jones," she teased in reply, "but watching you get beat up like that left me unable to think for a minute."

"You know," Ken said, rubbing a spot on his shoulder that was still sore - no one said the machine was perfect - "If you're going to keep calling him that, at least buy him a whip so you don't have to intervene next time."

Wendy laughed. "Fair enough. Sorry about the bowshot, by the way."

"Eh, that's alright. Now I know to keep an eye on my blind spots for potential enemies." Ken offered his hand.

Dipper and Wendy took turns shaking it as the former replied. "Good effort, but I hope you learned something else too. Something that'll make you seem more native to the region."

"What is that?" Ken smiled, confused but amused.

Dipper put an arm around his wife. "Hell hath no fury like a ticked off person with Corduroy blood."

"Or the Pines name, it seems." Ken added as the three laughed together.

#########################################################################################

" _I'm sorry, what?" Phoebe said, unaware that she was balling up her fist and crushing her Pitt Cola can in the process._

 _Ken looked alarmed at the amount of soda dripping over her hand. "Hey, I only said the second half of that! Your dad made the joke, blame him!"_

" _I don't even...why….Dad..." she calmed down enough to noticed the crushed can in her hand and the resulting mess. "Huh."_

 _Ken pried, "Who were you mad at just now, me or him?"_

 _Phoebe sighed as she got up to get some tissue to clean up. "Honestly, I don't even know anymore..."_


	5. Date Night (This one I'm nervous about)

" _You know, Phoebe..." Ken got up and paced the room a bit. "Your mom, well, I've noticed something about her." He was trying as hard as he could to word the next thought carefully._

" _Yeah?" Phoebe said, looking up at him with an inquisitive gaze. "Come on, just say how you feel."_

" _She's...not really the mushy romantic type."_

 _Phoebe relaxed and leaned back. "I mean, yeah, I'll give you credit there..."_

" _It honestly feels like Dipper is more into the grand gestures, ya know?"_

 _Phoebe cocked an eyebrow. "You're reaching a bit there...that's kinda harsh. Mom's done romantic stuff."_

" _Sure, like burning her hair on a candle when trying to make a romantic dinner?"_

" _And Dad once got bitten by a bunch of doves trying to set up an anniversary surprise, what's your point?"_

 _Ken sighed in mock resignation. "Oh, fine. My point was different anyway. I was just going to say that when she DOES go for something, she goes big. I'm just surprised how long it takes sometimes..."_

" _Wait, are you talking about..." Phoebe groaned in mock frustration. "You just LOVE talking about yourself, huh?"_

" _Well, sure, but also blame it on the watch." Ken pointed. "I've been getting messages from Castle that if he's spending a fortnight writing these, he's getting some worldbuilding out of it."_

" _What's worldbuilding?"_

 _Ken threw up his hands. "I dunno, I just work here….So a week after Dipper's anniversary surprise - yes, the one we talked about last year - Wendy sprung something on a similar scale: after she got a push..."_

###############################################################################################################

Ken woke up in a hammock outside of the Mystery Shack, confused for all the world as to what he was doing there. Then he remembered - after cleaning the bunker of the anniversary party from last night, he had crashed there to avoid having to ride home so exhausted. He went into the kitchen to see Wendy sipping a cup of coffee by herself. "Oh, um, good morning."

Wendy looked up. "Oh, hey Ken. Slept well?" Her face had a smile, but her eyes seemed...off.

"Yeah, thanks. Um, you got anymore coffee?"

"Sure, man. Help yourself." Wendy nodded to the kitchen counter, where the pot was still steaming. Ken filled up a mug and wordlessly sat across from the only occupant in the room.

After a moment of silence, Ken decided to start. "So, um... surprised to see you up so early."

Wendy chuckled a bit. "Well, I'm sure Dipper's sleeping well mostly because of the planning he had to do the past few weeks. Doofus gets like that sometimes - works on what he considers important tirelessly, then crashes. Ask him about your belt sometime if you don't believe me."

"Oh, I believe you." Ken leaned forward a bit. "But that's one adult out of all the ones that you somehow beat to the table. I don't think the problem is with them. I think something's bothering _you_."

Wendy sighed. "Man, this is why I talk to you like and adult and asked that you call us all by first name. You somehow get us too well."

"Quick study, I guess….so, what's eating you?"

Wendy leaned back and looked up in the sky. "Want to guess what Dipper and I did for our first anniversary?"

"Wait, so a year after the bunker or…?"

Wendy laughed. "Oh no, sorry. I meant our actual anniversary a year into being married. Sorry, we didn't start counting from earlier on until, well, later...on."

Ken shrugged. "It's fine. But humor me, what did you do?"

"Chinese takeout and a bad movie. I kid you not. And it was MY idea too. After Dipper had tred to do this whole thing with a bunch of doves..."

Ken snorted. "In an apartment. I don't know what he expected to happen."

"Well, yeah, he wasn't exactly his smarter self that day. Point is, though, he always worked to make our anniversaries special. Now I wonder why I never seem to. We have a date night this Saturday, and yet all I can think of is what B-rated movie to watch." Wendy kicked the corner of the table lightly.

Ken shook his head. "Wendy, if I may...you're not seeing the big picture here."

Wendy looked up, a bit of fire in her eyes that suggested the next words had to be carefully chosen. "How so?"

Ken smiled, not being put off at all by the look. "I was part of yesterday's event quite last minute, and yet I was able to see one thing very clearly. Dipper loves you, he loves everything about you, and he loves every minute he gets to spend with you."

Wendy calmed down a bit as the truth of his words washed over her. "So what, then? I've hit peak? No reason to do anything special for him?"

"Not exactly. I'd say the best thing you can do is keep making good memories with him - whatever that means." Ken got up. "Want some eggs?" He said, getting some out of the fridge.

Wendy drummed her fingers on the table as Ken got to work with a pan. "You know what, Ken? You're right...except for one thing..."

Ken turned around. "Which is?"

"He doesn't love every moment we've had together….because some of the ones from our first summer together, I ruined by doing the wrong thing. I do need to keep making new memories, but partly to make some of those right. But one in particular I need your help. Heck," she smiled. "I could use the entire family on this, but at the very least I need you, Finn, Soos, and the Shack."

Ken looked at her with confusion. "The Shack?"

Wendy chuckled. "Mabel ever told you of the first big dance party we held here?"

###############################################################################

A few days later, Dipper was returning to his room for some rest when he noticed a note on his pillow. "Wait, what's this?" With his trademark curiosity, he opened it up to find a very familiar hand:

 _Hey, Dork,_

 _I know we had plans for Sunday's date night, but I have another idea - one I don't want to spoil by looking at you as I give you this:_

As Dipper's eyes lowered down the page, he gasped at what he saw - a black bowtie. He was slightly confused - "Have I ever worn this outside of Northwest events?" In his heart he knew the answer, but...he shook his head as if to dispel those thoughts and kept reading:

 _Wear this and your normal clothes that day, and don't cancel the checkup on the manotaur caves - just be back at 7:00. I know you'll be tempted to try and find out what happens, but don't get itchy over this - just trust me._

 _Wendy_

Dipper chuckled. "I don't know what to expect, but something tells me I'll enjoy and regret it at the same time..."

#####################################################################################

6:59 PM on Sunday...

Finn looked at Ken as the two were in place. "Well, we're almost on. You ready?"

Ken brandished the sticks in his hands. "Twice in eight days. I should get paid for this."

Finn grinned. "Well, well, the superhero is getting greedy."

"Quiet, doods." Soos said from his position, even as the two could not see him. "He'll be here soon."

#############################################################################

After a long day and even a shower in the bunker - years of marriage taught a man to not interrupt the plans of your wife - Dipper stood in front of the door to the Mystery Shack, clutching his bowtie in his hand. Despite his wife's reassurances in the notes, he had to control every muscle fiber in his body to keep from itching. Instead, he simply tied the black fabric over the orange t-shirt, wishing he had a mirror to make sure it was straight. Of course, he caught himself thinking this way and began chiding himself for that instead.

"Easy there, Dipper...it's alright..." he muttered as his hand reached for the doorknob. "Wendy had a good reason for doing all this...you're acting like you're twelve again..." And with that he opened the door and was taken aback by the scene.

The entire main room of the Shack had been cleared out and replaced with a purple dance floor and strobe lights. Soos played a techno sound off his favorite synthesizer as Dipper walked in, causing the young man to notice that Soos had gone back to wearing the green T-shirt he had as handyman rather than his modern Mystery Host suit. Dipper couldn't help but say aloud. "OK….maybe I am twelve again."

Out of the corner came his favorite voice. "Depends. Do I look fifteen again?"

Dipper turned about to see what was probably the least surprising thing that night. There she stood, his Wendy, having gone through all the work of putting this together and yet still wearing her work boots, flannel green, a lumberjack cap, and a black bowtie matching his own...again, like that night.

Seeing her and her plan come to fruition, whatever nervousness Dipper had before coming in was gone, and he found himself grinning as he replied "You kinda do, lumberjack queen." But then he quickly became overawed again. "You did all this for me?"

Wendy smirked, "Well it was my idea, but come on. We're kids again, remember? Do you honestly think that I lifted a finger in doing all this?"

"Boom!" Mabel came out shooting a confetti gun with a giant POOF! "You're not the only one who gets to use family resources for romance, bro-bro. Decorating extraordinaire Mabel, at your service!"

Dipper looked around as the rest of the family gathered - Melody, Ford, Stan, even teenage Gladys and Phoebe all coming close to the dance floor but not stepping on. After all, they all knew this night was about _them_.

Dipper chuckled. "God, other than the crowd...with you and me dancing, this is almost exactly like how I imagined that night going."

Wendy grinned mischievously. "Well, one other big exception. Soos isn't a DJ for all of tonight...he's just an MC."

Dipper's eyebrow twitched in surprise. "Wait, then who - ?"

Soos interrupted by speaking into the mic "Ladies and Gentlemen, your cover band for tonight, please welcome Two Tune Monty!"

With that and some applause from the family, the makeshift curtain behind him dropped to reveal Ken and Finn behind the drums and guitar, ready to rock on. After a quick nod, Ken started drumming out the beat.

Dipper looked at Wendy in mock disgust as he said, " **Fall Out Boy's "Dance Dance"?** Really?"

Wendy laughed. "Be honest, dork. It wouldn't really be us if there wasn't something either unconventional or straight out of a B-movie. This felt like both."

"Oh well…Wanna dance?" Dipper graciously held out his hand. Wendy took it with a smile.

 **Ken:** **She says she's no good with words, but I'm worse**

 **Barely stuttered out a joke of a romantic stuck to my tongue**

As the two tried couples dancing to a song not meant for it, Dipper turned red upon realizing how true those words had been.

 **Ken: Weighed down with words too overdramatic**

 **Tonight it's "it can't get much worse", Versus "no one should ever feel like"**

"Regretting this yet?" Wendy grinned playfully, thinking of how overdramatic Dipper could be..

"A little...but you gotta try harder than that." Dipper said.

 **Finn: I'm two quarters and a heart down**

 **And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds**

 **These words are all I have so I write them**

 **So you need them just to get by**

Dipper suddenly started spinning with Wendy across half the floor, earning quite the whoop from the twin sister watching it all. As Finn finished the verse and entered the **guitar riff** , Wendy pulled Dipper close and whispered "Got a list?"

Dipper just grinned. "Oh you," before dipping her down low.

 **Finn and Ken: Dance, dance**

 **We're falling apart to halftime**

 **Dance, dance**

 **And these are the lives you love to lead**

 **Finn: Dance, this is the way they'd love**

 **If they knew how misery loved me**

Somehow they both knew exactly how to mock falling apart to halftime - by separating and literally almost falling to the floor before grabbing each other for support. They pulled back to each other, nearly bumping heads before letting go and solo dancing next to each other, just enjoying each other's company.

"This is WAY more fun than if we did this back then." Dipper said as he grooved.

"Shut up and dance," Wendy mocked.

"Wrong song," Dipper just laughed.

As the boys entered the second verse, the overhead lights turned off as strobe lights started their magic.

 **Ken: You always fold just before you're found out**

 **Drink up it's last call last resort**

 **But only the first mistake and**

"You getting out of work at the Shack..." Dipper was all too happy to use that as he spun his wife.

Wendy knocked his hat off and pushed his hair back while pulling him close. "You showing me this little gift..."

 **Finn and Ken: I'm two quarters and a heart down**

 **And I don't want to forget how your voice sounds**

 **These words are all I have so I write them**

 **So you need them just to get by**

 **Finn: Why don't you show me a little bit of spine**

 **You've been saving for his mattress, love**

Dipper suddenly found himself letting go of Wendy and dancing perfectly, his feet moving in ways that he did not seem to control. "What is happening?!"

Wendy laughed. "Just roll with it, I guess."

 **Finn and Ken: Dance, dance**

 **We're falling apart to halftime**

 **Dance, dance**

 **And these are the lives you love to lead**

 **Finn: Dance, this is the way they'd love if they knew how misery loved me**

As the guitar did a bit of a solo, Dipper gulped. Wendy smiled. "Even on our date night you're worried about family. Don't worry, I gave them a censored version"

Dipper grinned like an idiot. "Wendy, thanks for this. This is the second time this summer you've closed a gap in my soul from that first year."

Wendy joked, "Only two times? Gotta try harder." before kissing his cheek. "You're welcome doofus."

 **Finn and Ken (skipping a few bars): Dance, dance**

 **We're falling apart to halftime**

 **Dance, dance**

 **And these are the lives you love to lead**

 **Finn: Dance this is the way they'd love (Ken: way they'd love)**

 **Finn: Dance this is the way they'd love (Ken: way they'd love)**

 **Finn and Ken: Dance this is the way they'd love if they knew how misery loved me**

 **Finn: Dance, dance**

 **Dance, dance**

 **Dance, dance**

 **Dance, dance**

###############################################################################################

" _Well, not to boost your ego," Phoebe chuckled as the story came to a close. "But you two did a nice job."_

" _Thanks. Although, it kinda goes to show, I feel like a lot of romantic moments and dates involve family being there when it comes to your clan. Kinda like that whole first anniversary." Ken remarked, leaning back._

 _Phoebe shrugged. "Mom in some ways doesn't love Dad just for himself. She also loves everything about him, including the other people close in his life, like aunt Mabel."_

 _Ken groaned. "Did you have to word it like that?"_

 _Phoebe shot back. "Would you rather I reveal the verse of the song you and Finn conveniently cut out? Something about mattresses and..."_

 _Ken looked at where he imagined a camera would be and started gesturing with his hand. "Cut the feed, cut the feed!"_


	6. Flirting

_**CONFESSION: I DON'T KNOW A THING ABOUT FLIRTING. ALSO, BECAUSE MY UNIVERSE IS BASED ON SUPERGROVERAWAY, MOST IDEAL EXAMPLES OF FLIRTING HAVE BEEN ALREADY COVERED FOR ME. SO SORRY IF THIS UNDERSERVES.**_

" _Dipper and Wendy got together in the events that SuperGroverAway chronicled in 'Project Lumberdork' - thanks for that, by the way - " Ken briefly acknowledged the golden contribution. "So it sounds like they never actually did much of what you'd consider conventional flirting."_

" _Wow, just...wow." Phoebe shook her head. "Dad had a crush on her SO many times before they got together. You honestly think he didn't try flirting?"_

" _What, and she was just OK with that?" Ken asked incredulously._

" _Even back then, he was her boy, and more importantly..." Phoebe left the note hanging, waiting for Ken to jump in._

 _They together sighed, "Her dork."_

" _Besides, with the confession out of the way back in the bunker, it just became part of their good clean fun in later summers." Phoebe opened a scrapbook labeled_ " _Mabel's hindsight: Why bro-bro and Wendy were always going to end up together"_ " _Let's do the second summer Dad and Aunt MayMay were up here..."_

" _Hang on, this oughta be good." Ken pulled a lever on his chair, causing the footrest to spring up in front of him while the back lay flat so he was lying down. "There, now I can laugh at how bad these lines are. Hit me with it."_

" _Hold on..." Phoebe did the same to her chair. "That is better, actually. Now, then, to Dad's credit he only ever used it when Mom was dealing with a very specific problem..."_

#######################################################################################################

Thirteen-year-old Dipper held the question-mark shaped sausage on his stick. They were preparing for the same carnival as last year, and this time Soos had made sure the Shack had gotten some pre-day samples to check the freshness of the goods. Dipper bit the tiniest bit into the tip of the corndog before sighing in content. Last year's change in management had been a good one, it seems. He just hoped that this time there was no time traveling to be done - although to that end it certainly helped that he was no longer trying to pursue a certain redheaded teen.

SLAM! "What the - ?"

He jumped as said teen entered slightly late for her afternoon work shift, clearly upset at something based on the depressed look on her face. She muttered to herself, "Why do I even do these anymore?" Dipper took one look at her and knew he needed to act.

He walked over to where she was sitting behind the register and said, "Hey, Wendy?"

Wendy looked up and saw the concern he had in his eyes. "Oh, hey man. What's up?"

"Are you, um...alright? You seem...different from before lunch break."

Wendy leaned back. "I had agreed to meet up with a guy for lunch at the diner, and he turned out to be just the worst. Meathead on the wrestling team in high school, and then has the worst manners. I actually had to leave halfway and just spend some time in the woods before coming back."

Dipper awkwardly patted her back and said "It's alright, Wendy. It's just one guy."

Wendy shook her head. "Come on, man, I'm sure you noticed this is not just one guy. Ever since breaking up with Robbie, the dating game has been rough." She threw her head into a magazine, glad the Shack had no customers at the moment.

Dipper thought for a moment before looking down at his corndog. A crazy idea came into his head. "Hey, Wendy, you should know..."

Wendy looked up curiously as he continued…

"It only makes sense that those guys disappoint. After all, " he added, going to a sign where two planks - one on top of the other - said _Amazing Deals_. "They're just 'amazing?'" He held up the question mark of meat next to the top panel to prove his point. "Meanwhile, you're simply 'amazing'."

Wendy looked at him quizzically for a solid moment. Dipper felt nervous, wondering if he did the right thing. Then she burst out laughing.

"Y'know, some people would be upset if you were still like that after they rejected you."

Dipper saw that Wendy left him another opening and took it. "Yeah, well, some people don't threaten to jump into the Bottomless Pit if someone stops being their friend. What are you gonna threaten this time, go bass jumping in it?"

"Haha," Wendy got up from behind the countertop and checked the box of corndogs. "Soos got the samples?"

"Yeah, you looking forward to the fair tomorrow?"

Wendy cracked, "I think I'm looking more forward to what you'll mutter under your breath this time. Maybe 'I'd give you my life'?"

Dipper smiled. "I mean, I would, but that's besides the point."

As he turned around to put a few knick knacks up on the shelf, he heard Wendy say, "Hey Dipper, let's clarify something..."

He turned around and asked, "I didn't go too far, did I?"

She shook her head disappointedly. "Not far enough." Dipper was confused until Wendy pointed at the sign. "I'm not just amazing..." With that she pulled a corndog from the box that was far straighter than the question-mark sticks. "I'm 'amazing'!"

Dipper cracked up. "We have exclamation point ones? I didn't see it!"

Wendy kept going, "Well, never thought the paranormal super-sleuth who loves Mobian Chicken Strips would miss something like that."

The two were laughing for about five minutes before Wendy leaned down and scooped Dipper into a hug. "You're a good friend Dipper. I already feel better."

Dipper exhaled. "I wasn't sure if that was going to work. I had just read somewhere that flirting with someone, even if you have no intention asking them out, is a good way to remind them that they will be loved."

Wendy raised an eyebrow as they separated. "Read it? Sounds like something Mabel told you."

Dipper itched his shoulder as he responded, "Um, can't it be both?"

Wendy punched him in the arm. "Don't worry about it, man. Wherever you got it from, I'd say it's good advice. Now how about we finish this box up?"

With that, the two began unpacking the remainder of the merchandise, fully expecting to goof off all the while. And maybe eat more of those corndogs.

#################################################################################################################

" _Kind of a shame Soos stopped hosting that carnival a few years back," Ken sighed. "Seems like it's responsible for a lot of good Wendip memories."_

" _Yeah, something about increasing overhead costs and being unable to rig the dunktank," Phoebe replied. "But actually, Dad would then go on to help Mom out in a similar way about twelve more times over the course of three summers, with or without those corndogs."_

" _And let me guess - he didn't really get much better at it." Ken snickered._

" _Well, he was a pre-teen whose heart belonged to only one girl that he kept practicing on, who always loved it, and he even had his sister as a coach if needed." Phoebe looked up at the ceiling from her reclined chair. "So in short….no….no he did not..."_


	7. Moving in Together

_"OK, so with Wendy and Dipper commuting to each other while they were dating, they didn't move in until after they got married." Ken noted._

 _"Trust me when I say that they still had a few hurdles to cross when they did." Phoebe sighed._

 _"Really?"_

 _"There's such a thing as being too accomodating..."_

Dipper looked at the apartment that he had gotten for himself and Wendy. He was fairly satisfied with himself as he surveyed the various furniture that he had gotten with his first few archaeology paychecks - mahogany cabinets, bear rugs, four-poster king bed, a stuffed head to mount on a wall, a target for axe throwing, and even a few pieces of lumberjack weaponry. He personally didn't feel so good about the theme, but he couldn't help but remember the itching anxiety from last night.

She had to leave her entire old life behind in Gravity Falls. I have to try everything I can do to make her feel at home as we start our new life together. Hope I covered everything.

He checked his watch and realized that he had to head to Gravity Falls soon. The wedding was in a few days, meaning that it was Defcon 1 for the entire family to prep onsite - by his insistence, but that just made it more important the he himself was there. He took one last look before heading out. Hope she likes it...

Wendy Pines stood in front of the door to their new home, wondering if she was ready for what was within.

"So, I know it was a, um, gamble not asking you about design choices….probably should have, sorry…. but I wanted to surprise you with the new layout so it means a lot more when I say these next words." Dipper said as he nervously opened the door.

"And that would be..."

"Welcome Home."

Sure enough, as Wendy opened the door the memory of her youth in the Corduroy Cabin seemed to be alive right in front of her. She smiled at it all as the nostalgia kicked in, she looked at her new husband and noticed that his eyes were darting everywhere - from the mounted deer head to the axe-throwing station to her face in search of approval. She smiled hesitantly, not sure why she was questioning at all her next words. "This is great, Dipper. Thanks you." With that, she pulled him in for a hug.

He smiled. "Glad you like it."

Wendy sat in their apartment the next morning with Dipper having left for work - it would be a few days before her own transfer to the Piedmont workforce was cleared by the National Parks Department. The truth is, she should have asked that he kept some elements of his own life in the apartment that they now shared - when she woke up that morning, it felt so much like Gravity Falls that she nearly forgot where she really was.

As she opened the closet to get something to wear, she noticed something she had been too tired to see - three boxes labeled, "Old stuff". As she opened them up, she was amazed to find perfectly good books, scientific equipment, and entire wall shelves removed. She could only imagine what the place looked like before Dipper had made the renovations.

Then it hit her…"Wait...Dipper's face when he was looking at everything...oh God, he's uncomfortable." She smiled somewhat sadly. "The dork made so much effort to make the place look like me that he doesn't feel in his element in his own home."

As she pulled out one or two of the items from the box, she smiled. She had work to keep her busy, at least.

Dipper opened the door that afternoon with a "Hey, I'm ho - Wait..."

It didn't look at all like the home he had left behind that morning. The animal head was now replaced with his bookshelf, all four Gravity Falls Journals and a few other books resting on it with plenty of room. The axe target was now a digital clock - or more to the point, an analog clock on a digital screen - and the bear rug was nowhere to be seen. Many other gadgets hung across the wall, making the place look like some weird replica of Ford's lab in some parts.

"Hey, doofus," Wendy grinned as she put the last of "her" things in the now vacated boxes. "Like the remodeling?"

Dipper looked at her and smiled, but only for a second. "It's great, Wendy, I just...you shouldn't have."

"Dude, something wrong?" Wendy could tell there was a bit of unease in her husband's voice.

"I mean...I get what you tried to do, really, but I feel like you may have gone a bit overboard. Up to the point where it feels slightly uncomfortable again."

Wendy sighed. "I didn't want to say it, but...honestly, your design had the same effect."

"I'm sorry," He buried his face in his hands as he sat down. "I just wanted you to feel like you can call this home. I wanted you to be happy."

"Same here," she said, sitting next to him. "But I realize now that was stupid of me."

"No it wasn't, it-."

"Let me finish. It was stupid of me to try doing it alone. We've always been a good team, and now we're a married couple. So let's do it as we should have done it - together."

Dipper thought for a second before saying "Hang on, I got it", getting up and walking to a drawer. Wendy grimaced when she saw a rolled-up piece of paper was inside.

"Dude, you know your plans and lists never end well, right?"

Dipper brought it to the table. "Well, two differences here. One, I know this one sucks, and two...most of my plans aren't drawings." He opened it up to reveal a drawing if the apartment layout with various arrows pointing to certain areas. "It's a map I made as to where I put everything when I decorated. Let's take this, combine it with what you did, and put it together."

"Now THAT'S a plan!"

The next three hours saw them going around the room with boxes of stuff, deciding what to switch off by talking to each other nonstop with conversations like:

"OK, so sharp stuff stays in the kitchen?"

"Yeah, I'll return the target"

"Where'd you even get it?"

Or,

"I gotta admit, that deer head creeps me out."

"It does kinda stare into your soul. I should have told you, that was always moreof Dad's thing."

"So we keep the bookshelf there?"

"Sure, but you mind if I keep the mounting pegs? I could hang one or two lumberjack medals in the closet using those."

"Wendy, that's brilliant."

Or even

"I Iike the bear rug. Wow, it's amazing how soft this is."

"Yeah, just happy we aren't using anything more tapestry-like."

"Wendy…"

"I'm fine, dude, just...memories."

"We should probably move on. What if we were to move my clock here?"

"We really should have called Mabel to do all this."

At the end of the day, the two admired their handiwork side by side. The apartment no longer screamed Wendy or Dipper in a painfully loud manner. Now it really was something both could call home.

Dipper smiled. "Now I think it's safe to say this: welcome home, Wendy."

Wendy hugged him. "You too, doofus. Y'know what I liked best about this, though?"

"Yeah?"

She pointed to the sofa in front of the TV. "That in particular we didn't have to mess with because it was on both our plans."

As they sat together, Dipper commented. "Well, ever since we met, this was the part of any house that just screamed you and me."

"I agree, the only question is if we can find the right movies to go with it."

Dipper picked up the remote. "Don't worry, Piedmont TV is just as cheesy on some channels as Gravity Falls was."

And so the two settled down to finally enjoy their new home as husband and wife.

 _Ken chortled. "That is SO your parents. Tripping over each other to make each other feel happy." He looked out the window as he continued. "It's honestly part of what I love about them so much."_

 _Phoebe looked over her shoulder at Ken. "Hey, um, you OK?"_

 _"What? Oh, right, sorry, just….thinking."_

 _Phoebe looked up at the ceiling a bit, wondering how Ken got so lost in thought. "Well, let's move on for now…"_


	8. Bedtime Story

" _OK, so the next prompt is…?" As Ken checked his paper, he suddenly froze. "Phoebe? I promise I won't be mad..."_

" _What?"_

" _...but you have to explain how you did this." He turns the sheet over to reveal it reads "Bedtime Story"._

 _Phoebe became indignant. "You think I did that?"_

" _It's a bit coincidental that this favors you over me that heavily. I sure as heck don't have any stories for this. We're fourth wall-breakers for these events, you could have done something..."_

" _Our power ends with this universe, we're talking hundreds of writers here! Besides," Phoebe said, smirking, "All of these prompts have favored me. You showed up this May, remember?"_

 _Ken sighed. "Fair enough. So, I know Dipper used to read to you from the Journals, and Mabel almost ALWAYS told you the story of your birth - thank you SuperGroverAway for making those part of your canon," he dutifully noted. "That leaves one person….what did Wendy tell you?"_

 _Phoebe leaned back. "They each in a way helped me learn about who I am through their stories...Mom followed the same tradition in really the only way they left for her to do..."_

" _We should probably admit...some of this will just feel like a retelling of what you already know..."_

 _##################################################################################################################_

Wendy picked up Journal Number One from where it hung on the wall...before shaking her head and putting it down. Three-year-old Phoebe Pines looked up at her with eyes that somehow expressed her confusion. "Mama?"

Wendy laughed "I know, cutie, it's your favorite, I'm sorry." Then with a smile on her face, she continued. "But there's a lot more to your dad than exploration and the unknown, you know? He's a person underneath it all…one who's had a few tough trials to overcome, but has proven who he really is thanks to them."

She looked down at her and appeared to get lost in thought. In reality, though, she was reading off her cell phone in her lap - something she had asked Mabel to help her write to sound less like her rambling self and more like someone telling coherent bedtime story, even if it was an unconventional one.

"Let me tell you a story about a young girl living in Gravity Falls. Sixteen years ago, she was just a teenager looking after her brothers in a life that could be best described as humdrum. Then along came a set of twins - a young girl who was the most energetic human being she'd ever met, and this shy introverted boy who always had his head buried in a book at first - particularly this one book he happened to...find a few days into his stay."

Phoebe's eyes looked up with intent as Wendy continued, "Eventually he opened up to the world around him, too, and the homegirl was so taken by the twins' energy that she began to show them her favorite things to do. She was quick to learn two things, though. One, the town that she had considered simple and commonplace had mystery and the unbelievable surrounding it. Luckily her new friends were more than good company to explore some of those secrets with. But two, and more importantly….the boy would find himself attracted to her - her looks, her ways, he would later praise it all. And he would find every excuse to spend time with her - completely oblivious to the fact that she knew how he felt." She broke her storytelling tone to chuckle for a second. "Seriously, he was practically telling her every turn and somehow didn't realize it." With that she regained her mystical storytelling mindset and continued:

"Then came a day when his twin sister tried forcing him to confess to the girl. This worked, in a way - the near-death situation that followed caused him to tell what he thought was her broken body that he loved her. She was within earshot, at least, and at the time thought their age difference was too wide for it to ever work. But she refused to let him drift away from her out of pain from the rejection, and the two continued to spend a lot of time together, building memories that would bring smiles to both of their faces."

"But for awhile the girl could not understand why the boy had been so scared of telling her. Nerves were one thing, but needing to be convinced she was badly hurt? She had been with other guys before - even if none of them lasted long - but the boy who was now her best friend was a mystery for her to solve."

"One day, however, he gave her the answer without knowing it. It was a day even worse than the one forcing him to confess - where it felt like the whole world was against those two and a few select others. They found themselves face-to-face with another kid who claimed to love the twin sister, and had allied with this darkness to get her. But the boy looked this evil dead in the eye and told him a truth so powerful, he broke free of the darkness and fought back. The boy had said, simply, that being somebody worth loving was the only way to someone's heart."

"In all the confusion of that dark day, the girl was finally able to understand. Her friend had convinced himself that he could never be someone worthy of her love, and so had seen no point in ever mentioning it until his hand was forced. But she knew the truth - that she never saw him that way, that he was someone entirely different from what he imagined himself to be. Whenever she saw him over the next few years, she embraced everything about him - his crazy theories, his worry-prone selflessness - making sure he knew that he was more than nothing in her eyes."

"Time passed, and the two spent awhile without really seeing each other. But when they reunited, the girl - or woman, as she now was - realized something had changed. In her heart that friendship had bloomed to a form of love she didn't know with those other guys. It took awhile for her to be sure that he still felt the same way that he had all those years ago - but when she understood that, the two were happy indeed. They soon started raising a family together, but they refuse to call that their happily ever after. Mainly because the only thing better than a happy ending is a story that hasn't ended yet, and they still have a-ways to go before seeing the end together."

Having finished reading off the script, Wendy looked at her daughter to find she was now snoring. Smiling at her baby girl, she whispered, "That's who you are, too. Good night, cutie," before slinking away.

In the master bedroom, Dipper sat in bed reading one of the field reports from an archeological dig he regretted not being able to oversee personally. All that regret and other thoughts about ancient history, however, disappeared as he saw Wendy come in. He smiled and put up the papers before noting, "You seem to take a lot longer than I do when you're on storytime duty."

Wendy grinned before teasing. "I guess I just get into my story more. It sure makes for better reading than a journal entry."

"Maybe," Dipper slyly replied. "But I bet you it's no less predictable. It was a story about me and you in our teenage and tween days, wasn't it?"

As Wendy lay down next to her husband, she replied, "Nice try, doofus, but I know you know that only because Mabel showed you the draft. Something about you getting nervous about it."

Dipper sighed as he looked up to the ceiling, "I just feel like in a few years she won't want to hear it anymore. I wasn't exactly the smooth Prince Charming back then that a young girl looks up to."

"She's not like other girls. Besides," Wendy looked at him. "I made it clear that there were a bunch of other guys back then - some of whom were basically that - and yet I ended up choosing you."

Dipper cracked a small smile. "Admit it, you mostly want Phoebe to understand that her mother is someone willing to stick through thick and thin with even the most cringeworthy of her friends."

"Well, that...and that her father holds himself to high standards, protects fiercely the body and soul of those he cares about, and is the bravest and smartest guy I've ever met."

He held her close. "Thanks Wendy." After a pause he added, "You know, there's one benefit to telling a story based on real memories…."

"What's that?"

"Adults can just remember the good moments from that and it becomes a mini-story to them...so it kinda...works..to help them sleep...too..." soon her was snoring.

Wendy found herself similarly reminiscing as she too drifted to bed. The two slept in each other's arms, satisfied by the same bedtime story that guaranteed their daughter sweet dreams in the next room.

###################################################################################

" _OK, I'd be lying if I said that wasn't sweet."_

" _Right?" Phoebe nodded as she took a second can of cola. "And between you and me….sure beats hearing how my mom gave birth to me in the most uncomfortable circumstances possible for the umpeenth time."_

" _I'd be amazed if you weren't slightly sick of that particular kind of tale," Ken said as he munched some chips before adding for dramatic effect, "or disgusted, I haven't decided..."_


	9. Potluck - Double Date

" _Phoebe, you ever think about that dating advice that people give - you know, never be friends with your exes?" Ken looked over his shoulder to assess Phoebe's reaction._

 _Phoebe looked back at him with curious eyes. "I mean, sure, I can see the merit in that, but I already know one example where this isn't such an issue - Robbie and Mom are friends, despite Robbie basically being the worst boyfriend she'd ever had."_

" _Yeah, after seeing Thompson get beat up by concert security as I recall," Ken shook his head. "Your family has some weird memories."_

" _Your words say you hate it, but your body and everything else about you say you love it."_

 _Ken squirmed. "Erm...hung jury?"_

 _Phoebe laughed. It was good to hang out like this. "So, why ask?"_

" _I just find it even weirder that said ex then becomes close friends with the ENTIRE family of the new boyfriend who eventually becomes the husband."_

" _I mean, he knew Mabel and Stan for a while even before breaking up with Wendy. But yeah, when you put it that way it sounds like the plot of a horror film."_

" _It probably is. You know Hollywood - making it a story about revenge against the new boyfriend or whatever."_

 _Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Well, at least in THIS case history proved there was no malintent. Heck, some of Dad's visits when dating mom involved getting together with Robbie and Tambry at the same time."_

 _Ken smiled deviously. "Two date couples, both alike in dignity?"_

 _Phoebe decided to humor him on this one. "In fair Oregon where we lay our scene."_

 _The two of them laughed together as the memory of the story itself came washing down on them…._

##############################################################################################################################

"Wendy!"

"Tambry, what's up!?"

The two women hugged together in front of the entrance to the Greasy Diner. It had been a few months since they'd seen each other, what with one of them now taking classes for arborist certification. But they weren't alone at the diner that day. Shortly after breaking the embrace, the two turned to the men on either side of them as they walked up to face each other.

The black-haired goth spoke first. "How's it been, dweeb?"

The brunette opposite of him, looking at eye level for the first time, replied. "I could ask the same, punk jerk."

Tambry tensed a little and nearly stepped forward to stand by her significant other, but Wendy just put a hand on her shoulder and gave a small grin with a reassuring nod. Tambry turned her attention back to the two men.

"Still chasing down ghosts and whatnot like some freak collector?"

"Depends, still writing songs that just scream 'copyright lawsuit?'"

For a moment the two of them stared each other down, maintaining their authoritative gazes. Finally the black-haired one broke and laughed. "Alright, you win."

Dipper smiled and offered Robbie one hand to shake while pulling him close by the shoulder for a half-hug using the other. "Five to zero, my favor, I think."

Robbie chuckled as he accepted the greeting. "Alright, Pines, off the high horse. That's like, five wins in three years, nothing special."

The four of them had a bit of a group hug that was apparently initiated by Wendy, as she cracked, "Look at my boys getting along….literally years after I tell them to." She then turned to Tambry. "I kinda figured they'd do something like that."

Tambry laughed. "Some things never change. Ready to grab a table?"

#########################################################################################

The four of them were soon munching down on pancakes and coffee omelettes together, taking a minute before talking to just enjoy the food - Lazy Susan was always good with food, but she seemed to improve over time.

Robbie cracked, "Not the most romantic place for a double date. We're all a bunch of weirdos for this, eh?"

Dipper grinned apologetically. "Well, I'd say that's what makes it make perfect sense for us to be doing this. Besides, we were a bit busy last night."

His opposite number raised an eyebrow jokingly. "Really? How many B-movies did you veg your way through this time?"

Wendy grinned. "Well, you know us too well, clearly."

Tambry put down her glass as she spoke, "It was a team effort, actually. I'm the one who figured you two would hold onto whatever made your friendship special from old times."

Robbie added "and I'm the one who remembered that Wendy would talk about that being some of the highlights of that first summer."

Wendy laughed. "So you _were_ listening."

Robbie became sheepish. "Only when he was involved - jealous of the pipsqueak and all. I've gotten better though."

Tambry raised her hand. "I'm witness to that. Anyway, Wendy, how many did you guys watch last night?"

"Um, three. Why?"

Wendy was a bit confused at the question until Robbie unceremoniously pulled a five from his wallet and gave it to his girlfriend. Tambry smirked as she leaned on Robbie, saying "I told you she'd be laughing too hard to make it to five."

Dipper decided to take his opening. "What about you? Listened to an entire album of screamo?"

"Half of one, actually."

After an awkward silence, Dipper silently got a five from _his_ wallet and gave it to _his_ girlfriend. Wendy chuckled and pecked his cheek. "Thanks, doofus."

######################################################################################

An hour later, the four were at Wendy's apartment sitting randomly about. Dipper decided to ask the now satiated Tambry a burning question. "That was great and all, but I know you chose today for a reason. And I think I know what it is."

Tambry looked at him in shock. "How did - ?"

Dipper gestured to her hands. "You worked hard keeping that hand hidden under the table so we wouldn't see it's gloved...but that was your dominant hand, so it gave it away."

Wendy was at first lost herself. "Dipper, what are you - " suddenly, as she turned from Robbie to Tambry to Robbie to Tambry again, she put it together. "No way. You're not - ?"

Tambry smiled broadly as she gleefully whipped the glove off to reveal a ring on the hand. "We're engaged!"

Wendy jumped up. "That's awesome, guys! Man, I really hope the best for y'all!"

As the girls hugged, Tambry replied. "Thanks. I haven't forgotten our deal, by the way, so get ready for a bridemaid's outfit."

Wendy groaned in half-horror. "God, no..."

While the two celebrated, the boys laughed from watching them before Robbie said, "Dipper, man, mind if I check your schedule outside? We want to make sure you'll make it." However, he gave a subtle enough nod to tell Dipper that what he really wanted was privacy.

The two trooped onto the patio, Pitt Colas in hand, and leaned over the banister.

"So, Robbie, what's really up? Worried a little?"

"About the wedding, no. But there was something I had to do first." Robbie looked at him dead in the eye before continuing. "Thank you."

Dipper looked surprised. "For what? It was Mabel who - "

"Yeah I know, and she'll get her thanks soon enough - or you can pass it along for me, I don't care. But if you hadn't busted me for the song - or shown me how much of a jerk I was that first summer when we were kids..." Robbie looked at him dead in the eye. "...I wouldn't be who I am today. I definitely wouldn't be man enough to propose to Tambry, and she wouldn't have said yes even if I thought I was. Both you and your sister had a hand in this moment. Remember that."

"I, um….thanks." Dipper stared out into the open for a moment before continuing, "All the same, I have to envy you. It takes a lot of courage to pop the question, I imagine."

"Oh, for me, tons. But what about you?"

Dipper looked at him in shock. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that I saw your reaction when Tambry announced the engagement. You looked at Wendy - not just to see her reaction, but to think about another day in the future..."

Dipper ran a hand through his own hair. "I'm just worried about messing up or scaring her off."

"Scaring her off? Come on, punk." Robbie teased. "We both know she eats fear for breakfast."

"This is a different kind of scare, though….we've only been dating for eleven months..."

"Maybe, but you two have known each other for years, and all that time you were nothing but mature. Tambry had to first see a bad side of me. Wendy has never seen a bad side of you - not one that repelled her, anyway." His eyes reflected some sense of shame as he finished that sentence.

Dipper looked at him with disbelief. "You don't mean to say that you think I should go for it, do you?"

Robbie looked at him knowingly. "I'm just saying that you have less reason than me to be afraid of taking that chance if you want to."

Dipper's hand went into his pocket and clutched tightly something inside. "I guess I do...Thanks, Robbie. And again, congratulations."

Robbie went back in, reverting briefly to his teenage self as he said, "Whatever." But then he smiled. "Something tells me I'll be saying that right back soon enough."

As he went inside, Dipper pulled the box out of his pocket and smiled. "You just might, Robbie...you just might..."

########################################################################################################################################

" _Well, we all know how well that went" Ken cracked, referencing a story he remembered about Soos and Mabel trying to help Dipper propose, only for the entire gang to get attacked by wolves._

" _Oh yeah," Phoebe laughed. "Typical plan-gone-awry, I suppose. Still, I can't help but admire Robbie and Tambry. I hear they're marriage has been stable."_

" _Despite the...um, less-than-savory method your aunt used to get them together?"_

 _Phoebe shrugged. "You'll never hear me say that she was right, but sometimes people need a push. It wouldn't have lasted if they weren't meant for each other. Besides, they made great double-date partners, based on what we just saw."_

 _Ken looked at her and snorted. "You make it sound like their happiness is secondary to that of your own parents. Selfish much?"_

" _Hey," Phoebe shot back, throwing a couch cushion at him. "You're the one co-hosting this with me. It's WenDip week, not Tambrobbie week."_

 _Ken raised an eyebrow. "Tambrobbie? Really?"_

 _Phoebe relented. "Yeah, OK, that name needs workshopping…."_


	10. Wildcard - Episode 2 Epilogue

_Ken and Phoebe, after a brief disappearance, return to their chairs and sit down, teir faces now both solemn and thankful._

" _If you're reading this, then congratulations," Ken began. "You were actually willing to wait for Kamen Rider Weird's 'The Return' to finish before reading our last installment of Wendip week."_

 _Phoebe continued, "Not like Castle left you waiting for long. Trust us, he's been dying to finally get more content out, all he needed was an excuse to push himself to - what is that?" Phoebe turned to the black bowtie on top of Ken's brown t-shirt, peeking out from the black rain jacket._

 _Ken raised an eyebrow. "Really? You felt the need to point that out? This is a special event here!"_

 _Phoebe closed her eyes. "I told you before - just because my parents do it doesn't mean you can pull the look off."_

" _Fine," As Ken pulled the bowtie off, he continued, "Anyway, we made you all wait because this is meant to be a sort of epilogue to that Episode before moving to Episode 3."_

 _Phoebe nodded. "Mom was the one who convinced Dad to open up to the family, and helped him on the way to realizing that he may not be the Kamen Rider the town needs. But even after all that - and after what I have to admit was impressive showmanship for Parallel King Kraus - "_

" _\- thank you -_

" _-there was still some lingering doubt in Dad's mind…and who else could help him resolve them?"_

#############################################################################################################

Dipper sat in the break-room-turned-bedroom, dressed in night clothes yet unable to go to bed. So much had happened the past few days that he didn't want to try processing it all in his sleep. Especially the burning question that had replaced the one that had kept him up at night. He held in his hand an empty flashdrive he had taken from the lab below and was rotating it in his hand, trying to give his muscles something to do and somewhere to channel the stress.

"Hey, Dipper, have you seen the - " Wendy walked in while wearing her flannel pajamas and saw her husband at the window. "Hey, you alright?"

Dipper looked up. "Oh, um, yeah, sorry….what were you looking for?"

"Just the paint stencils. Mabel said you had them last."

"Oh, sure" Dipper walked to the desk and picked them up before handing them to Wendy. Wendy grabbed them closer to his own hand than expected and didn't let go.

"Um, Wendy?"

She shook her head. "The flashdrive isn't helping."

"What does that even mean?"

"It means I can still feel you shaking, and I know something is bothering you." Guiding her husband to the couch, Wendy continued, "Lay it on me, man. Still unsure about Ken doing this?"

Dipper sighed. "Wendy, I meant what I told him. Now that I've seen how he works under pressure, I think he can do just fine on the battlefield. I'm not worried about making the right choice on that front." He looked at the drive in his hand and put it down. "Nor do I think preparing the remaining weapons for Kamen Rider Weird is going to be a challenge."

"So what is it, then? What part is it that you're worried about?"

Dipper exhaled sharply. "Being able to teach him." As Wendy raised an eyebrow, Dipper hastily added, "No, I'm sure he's a sharp bo, and what he did with the Gnome Chapter proves he can learn fast. I'm worried whether I'm qualified to teach him. He's relying on my to help him understand Gravity Falls enough to be a good Kamen Rider - help him learn what he needs to know to fight off armies of a species that I know little about myself. He's counting on me to make certain that he can return to his mother a hero and not in a bodybag. I don't know if I'm up for it, if I can - "

He had closed his eyes as he spoke, but at that point he suddenly felt Wendy grab his shoulder and squeeze tightly. "OK, dork, let me stop you right there. You're going about this all wrong."

"What? Wendy, how - ?"

She started holding up fingers. "One. Nothing in Gravity Falls is certain. You know, I know it, Mabel knows it, and everyone who hasn't moved away knows it. We have a farmer who regularly chases floating eyeballs out of his barn, and he knows it. Ken? He may have been here only three days, but he's seen enough to know it too."

"OK, but - "

"Two. He's not expecting someone who's perfect, ok? If he was, he wouldn't have forgiven you for what you said when you took the Journal Driver away from him. You basically just said, in different words, that he looks up to you. Three - " Wendy smiled. "- you should know by now that you _are_ someone worth looking up to. Not just because of what you know, but your bravery and desire to put everyone else above your own needs and safety. He shares that, and he wants to know what it means to see that at his full potential."

Dipper looked his wife square in the eyes and asked, "You think I can show him that?"

"I know you can. Because four…this isn't your first student."

Dipper's face registered surprise. "Wait, what?"

"Finn. Gladys. Phoebe. Sure, our kiddo got her survival skills from me, and Mabel gave Gladys the ideal example of how to care for living creatures with such a tender heart. But when it comes to exploring what most consider paranormal, they got most of it from _you_. They've learned from you their whole lives. Yeah, Ken is coming later into the game….but more than a decade...but you can still use what you learned from teaching your family when it comes to teaching him."

For a while there was a pause as Dipper let this churn in his head. Wendy waited about forty seconds for a response before being pulled into a heavy hug and receiving a peck on the cheek. "Every day that I don't say you're the best, call me a liar, will you?"

Wendy laughed as she hugged him back. "Sure thing, doofus. Ready for bed?"

As they turned off the light and settled in for a night, Wendy said, "So, not that you need it, but I had a fifth point if you're interested."

"Sure," Dipper said as they snuggled up close.

"At the end of a day, a huge part of being a mentor is being a good friend. And in all the time I've known you, I learned one thing - whether with those younger or older you always know how to be a good friend."

"Thanks, Wendy." He smiled a bit before a thought occurred to him. "Pity I'll be doing so much in the lab, though, and he'll have to be out and about. Part of the reason our friendship worked way back then is we were doing so much together. I wish he could have someone like that."

"Sometimes good friends can help find people get other good friends. You'll think of something." Wendy yawned as she fell asleep.

Dipper's mind churned for a fair bit before allowing himself to embrace sleep. He searched for a few possible solutions, no single one of which held a distinct advantage over the rest. Still, he found himself at peace as he began to lose consciousness for the night. _I sure will figure something out, Wendy...I sure will…._

And thus the couple slept more soundly than they had for the past three months since this trouble all began.

###########################################################################################################

" _Wendy Corduroy Pines," Ken marveled, "always the anchor to what is otherwise one of the greatest minds I know."_

" _You know, I'm kinda happy this event is coming to an end." Phoebe laughed goodheartedly. "I won't have to hear your broad generalizations about my parents' love life for awhile."_

" _Ah," Ken dismissively waved a hand. "Try telling me you won't miss this."_

" _I would...except that we get a lot of actual adventuring to do on_ Kamen Rider Weird _, so that should keep us busy." She turned to the audience. "Please check it out for more of us, Dad, Mom, Aunt Maymay, and the entire Pines clan as they take on the ferocious Parallel armies."_

" _Special thanks to Fereality for supporting us this Wendip Week, and as always to SuperGroverAway and ddp456 for letting us reference so many of their stories. For now, I'm Ken Takigawa..."_

" _...I'm Phoebe Pines..."_

" _...and we'll see you all next year!"_


End file.
